I’m The Girl (Spoken Word).

That everyone wants to be,

they always wish

they were me.

Think they know what

they see.

 

I am the girl,

that your mother would love,

your father would cherish,

your heart would break into two…

 

If I was you,

I’d leave whilst I can…

because I am everything

you don’t know.

 

There is something inside

me that breaks every morning

still alive.

 

I break my back trying to

reach back to my past,

because I fucking hate what I

have become.

 

Because who would love

this girl?

 

I could tell you stories of

how I would whirl you

off your feet.

 

Your life would be complete.

 

That is not how this

story ends.

 

Because who loves a girl

who doubts very

own self?

 

Spending hours awake hoping

her flaws will fall off her

like dust,

settle on the floor,

find the exit door.

 

I am the girl who

gladly tears herself apart

to find something to prove

that she feels.

 

That her lack of choice

is definitely real.

 

One too many blades have

kissed the tender skin

on my body.

 

Skimmed away

my thighs with

one tiny slice.

 

I have battled with

myself and lost too many

times,

more than I can count.

 

My blood has run like

tears,

one too

many

times.

 

I am the girl who

hates how she looks,

sees fat every where she

turns.

 

Oh

 

Why can’t I be thin?

 

Just for one day?

 

What does skinny feel like?

 

And can I buy it on eBay?

 

I can harm myself again,

I’ve learned to betray my

beating heart.

 

I am so sorry I’m trying

to drain the life

from myself.

 

I just want to be…

pretty.

 

I want to cut the

fat from my bones.

 

I am the girl

who you probably want to fuck,

but I am not the girl

you want.

 

I am the girl who you’ve tried

to save,

one too many times.

 

And one day,

I’ll be gone.

 

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